i think maybe my absolute biggest fashion pet peeve is when people (usually obnoxious types) truly think they dress really well/edgily, but in reality just look like an insane clown. i'm all about being adventurous/edgy in the realm of fashion, by all means. but why, oh why, are you taking what may be a decent idea and then shitting all over it by going completely off the deep end with clashy colors, absurd accessories (nice alliterations, me!) and full-on sluttiness?? didn't you learn anything about color theory in middle school art class? didn't your mother teach you only to expose your breasts to the boy (or girl. hayyy, S!) you're dating currently? COME ON NAH.
a brief (read: slightly extensive) case study (faces have been censored to protect the...er...guilty):
okay, what the hell is even going on here? "the colors, duke, the colors!!" more like the colors--(puke!)--the colors. if only you could see the enormous halos of iridescent blue eyeshadow underneath the grotesque black box (forgive me, i only have mspaint to work with on this craptop o' mine).
at first glance, this is mostly just a bit boring. and the colors are a tad troubling, again.
but wait!
....
SINCE WHEN DID ELECTRIC BLUE (SEE HEELS) GO WITH THAT *CLASSIC* GOLD-PURPLE-RED COMBO?? since never, that's when.
...
i don't think this offense really requires an explanation.
so, the dress on its own is actually kind of cool. the gym shorts, thigh-high red socks and visible obnoxiously-colored brassiere i cannot explain.
slutzilla. icing on the proverbial cake (acid washed wedding cake?), as it were.
this one is almost good. SO CLOSE. all the individual pieces are attractive: high-waisted jumper, vintage "New Orleans French Quarter" tee (hayyy. represent!), classic black nylons. my only significant complaint about any individual piece is the red shoes. red heels could definitely be done with an outfit like this/with this color palate. but pointy heels, especially red strappy patent ones, are decidedly a no-no. also, when all the parts are pulled together it almost starts to push its limits. almost.
ARE WE AVRIL LAVIGNE? WHY THE WEIRD GLOVE THINGIES?? (this was a repeat offense, incidentally.)
no dice, girly. not now.
a brief (read: slightly extensive) case study (faces have been censored to protect the...er...guilty):
okay, what the hell is even going on here? "the colors, duke, the colors!!" more like the colors--(puke!)--the colors. if only you could see the enormous halos of iridescent blue eyeshadow underneath the grotesque black box (forgive me, i only have mspaint to work with on this craptop o' mine).
at first glance, this is mostly just a bit boring. and the colors are a tad troubling, again.but wait!
....
SINCE WHEN DID ELECTRIC BLUE (SEE HEELS) GO WITH THAT *CLASSIC* GOLD-PURPLE-RED COMBO?? since never, that's when.
...i don't think this offense really requires an explanation.
so, the dress on its own is actually kind of cool. the gym shorts, thigh-high red socks and visible obnoxiously-colored brassiere i cannot explain.
slutzilla. icing on the proverbial cake (acid washed wedding cake?), as it were.
this one is almost good. SO CLOSE. all the individual pieces are attractive: high-waisted jumper, vintage "New Orleans French Quarter" tee (hayyy. represent!), classic black nylons. my only significant complaint about any individual piece is the red shoes. red heels could definitely be done with an outfit like this/with this color palate. but pointy heels, especially red strappy patent ones, are decidedly a no-no. also, when all the parts are pulled together it almost starts to push its limits. almost.
ARE WE AVRIL LAVIGNE? WHY THE WEIRD GLOVE THINGIES?? (this was a repeat offense, incidentally.)no dice, girly. not now.
do you know what i'm talking about? you can see where they're going with it, in many cases, but then everything gets lost in a seasick cesspool of clashing colors, tacky accessories and tastelessly revealing clothing. TSK TSK!! honestly.
-a.
5 comments:
i think "scathing" is a wee bit of an understatement
also...
"didn't your mother teach you only to expose your breasts to the boy (or girl. hayyy, S!) you're dating currently?"
hehe
wait, what are you talking about, that dress looks like an acid-washed wedding cake.
it's funny!
well. *I* could pull it off is i guess what i'm trying to say.
pssssh.
sry, homegirl right here has issues. bb, i gots some wellbutrin for sale if you want an alternate path to drowning your daddy issues cause attention whoring ain't cuttin it
AH! This is my gripe with this girl, too. The worst part is she's totally "cutting-edge" compared to her friends. If I had to look at them everyday, I'd consider myself hot shit, as well.
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